The first thing we think of when building relationships is one-on-one conversations with students. The reality though is this: We have SO many things to do as teachers, and realistically we may not have time to have a sit-down conversation with every single student in the first few weeks.
For me, the best way to build relationships with students is during class. Here are a few options that you should implement into your instruction:
1. Tell personal anecdotes about yourself to show them the PERSON that you are during teacher models/think-alouds.
For example, today during Poet Warriors, there was a brainstorming activity in which we had to choose a family member to characterize. I took this opportunity to characterize my sister, Emily, and tell students more about my life. Students were able to ask me questions in real time, and get to know me better. Below is a picture of my brainstorming graphic organizer about my sister.
2. A second way is to give positive encouragement and feedback as you are circulating that room. For example, while they are drafting a story or constructing their reader's response, I circulate the room and read their responses. (This is also an example of a silent Check For Understanding) As I read their responses, I point to specific things that are good and say things like, "Wow, (name) I really love that you added that figurative language into your poem. It really helps me visualize what you're writing about. Great job!" This relationship builder is so easy to do, and means more to your students than you know. They SO yearn to be loved on with words and told they are smart and doing the activity correctly. Every time they are doing any kind of student-centered work, you have an opportunity to do this. (Be genuine in your feedback though. They won't grow if you just tell them you love them.)
3. Shout outs! If you see a student helping another student, or you see an exemplary answer, shout them out in front of the class! (ex. "Hey guys, I just want to take a second to shout out something that I noticed Anastasia doing. She came in today and immediately started helping her partner with the Do Now without me even asking her to do it. She's really promoting the idea that we are a family. Let's give her some snaps.") You will also notice that the more you model this, your students will start to shout each other out and further that community that you're shooting for.
4. Whole-Class shout outs. If a beautiful moment happens during your instruction, if student participations is way up, or just if nobody fell asleep today in your class (small, but a celebration nonetheless!), take a moment to call that out and tell them how proud you are of them.
5. Questions. Sometimes I see a student write something that I want to know more about, or I want them to think deeper. I just go crouch in front of their desks and ask them to tell me more about their answer. That quick one-on-one interaction may be content-centered, but it also does a lot for your personal relationships.
6. Talk about things that are interesting and relevant to your kids. As sad as this is, your kids have probably not read Harry Potter, they probably haven't heard of TLC, and most disastrous of all, they probably have never seen or heard of Saved By the Bell. Don't try to force your own interests onto them. Get up to date on what THEY are reading, what THEY are interested in, so that you can participate and lead conversations. You will rarely find me with an adult book. Teen fiction is always in my hands. While I do enjoy the books, I don't read them for me. I read them, because I want to be able to talk them up to my kids and have meaningful discussions about them with my kids. If you are looking for new teen fiction titles to read, look at one of my earlier posts about the books every teacher needs in their in-class library or look on Amazon and pay attention to the ratings of the book. If over thousands of people loved it, chances are you and your kids will too.
7. Plan for activities that allow students to express themselves and tell their own story. The curriculum for the summer lends itself so well to this, but when you enter into the year, give your students a chance to tell their story and express themselves in a meaningful way. (This can be done in any content area. Not just English!!!)
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